A Kick in the Pants

You deserve a kick in the pants.

I will get to the reason why I think you do, but for now let’s discuss pants. Why are they called “pants” or a pair of pants? Why is it plural? I don’t think anyone knows. Maybe because pants have two legs. But then again, shirts have two arms and they’re not called a pair of shirts. It doesn’t matter. “Pants” sounds funny and that matters. “Trousers” sounds even funnier but nobody says that word anymore except cowboys, who are extremely cool and who always make plain sense of everything. I know this because I’ve seen every cowboy movie ever made. Well except that one where a brave cowboy broke his back on some mountain. Anyway, “pants” is just a funny word. And so I think a kick in the pants is, by extension, humorous as well. Sort of.

cowboys

Early in my life, I found pants-kicking to be highly unpleasant experience, having been on the receiving end of said activity more than once from my old childhood adversary and sometimes best friend, whom I will refer to as Butch for my future protection. Butch was a 12 year-old pants-kicking specialist, who apparently believed that my backside was a perfect fit for his relatively large foot size. And by the time he was done kicking me in the pants, I believe he was correct. But later, I adopted a more favorable connotation of those words with the help of an older (and much more agreeable) gentleman named Ben Riley. Ben had a saying that he used often. He would say “Man, that’s a kick in the pants!” He said that about a great meal, a good story, a thrill, or basically about anything that pleased him. For Ben, a kick in the pants was something worthwhile, exciting, or that was a great experience. To him, nothing was better than a kick in the pants.

Calvin kick

And that’s why I think you deserve a kick in the pants. You deserve something worthwhile and exciting, and you deserve a great experience. And Eastern Diagnostic Imaging will give you exactly that. I truly believe that we are a perfect fit for you. Oh, but definitely not in the same way that Kenny Johnson believed it for me. I mean Butch.

Instead, EDI, as your imaging partner, will provide you with the highest quality pre-owned, refurbished or remanufactured x-ray equipment in the marketplace, and the best after-sale support in the nation. We feel that by doing our job well, we will make your purchasing decisions rewarding.

You don’t have to be a cowboy to know that it just makes plain sense to call EDI for your imaging needs. We will be a very pleasant kick in the pants for you. Or trousers, if you prefer. And that’s exactly what you deserve, partner.